Friday, November 30, 2012

I vound up at my ex Virlfriends house chugging cheap Veer.

A few very important points.
1. If you could gain all of Steven Hawkings knowledge and wisdom and all you had to do was sleep with him, would you do it?
I would like to think that the answer to that question is easy.
2. Would you rather fight an ostrich in heat or mike tyson with no eyes.
3. When is it no longer cool to wear Jinko Jeans?
4. How many polygamous wives is too many?
5. Why is CSI so easy to watch even though the writing is so terrible?
6. Why When Where Who What How hitherto honk honk humperdink happily married. 

K here it goes it is time to do some free writing. You know that phsycoanalysis game where you say the first word that comes to your head. I am going to type that. And the word I am going to start with is.......
war. Oar. Board. Chord. Tune. Bloom. Flower> Power. Tower. London. Rundun. Rundown. Funtown. Clown. Gown. Round. Fat. Lady. Hot. Easy. Pliable. Laid. Brick. House. Town. Car. batch. ratch. catch. fish. rainbow. river. mclean. town. bluegrass. ian. guitar. flat pick. flat lady. hot lady. red hot. cheap pizza. sauce. friends. chicken. dinner. mom, cook. food. illegal. pizza. pepporoni. ass crack. skate. park. ducks. feather. wind. catch. fish. rainbow. gold and or gay. love. sadness. no love. run. hide. cave. wonders. 8. china. wwf. panda. bamboo. candy. van. dream. wet. water. slide. babysitting. cat. litter. donald duck. ruck. rugby. pain. shoulder. ugh. scared. finalized. asian. hot. walking rod. inside joke. michel. nietche. franz. potso. gonzo. penis. rebus. lager. flag. tower. hour. lighthouse. bees. comet. ralph. barf. x.  rararararararrararara shishcoomba. Goomba. mario. luigi. jump. man. women. uterus. rust. bust. breasts. clevage. motorboat. gloat. roat. steve row. row hard. hardcore. hardcore bastard. flink clonk. ronch. ranch. dance. western. can I am able to do this by typing in the letters. The fact that I can type in this bullshit is an example of how much I have and don't understand why it is so amazing. There is no way that I could tell you how any of this works. My computer. Myhands. The mouse. the keyes. The music or sounds in the background. The beer in my belly. It is amazing that I live in a world where I literally have no clue how anything works and yet I am able to be richer than 99% of people that have ever lived in all of time. Good God. How I do not deserve all of this yet I accept it. My life. My life. My life. My life. My loaf. My love. My Crotch. My deuche. My man. My love.
My Love. My love. my love.Mine Love. The love of Mine. She or he who I do love. The apple of my eye. My other half. My better half. My ball and chain. My dearest. Yours truly. 
Well this was a good exersize in pure shit. I suppose this is how I feel most weekends when I don't have anything to do. Take that as you will But I find it strangly comforting. 
I think that the inside of the mind is impossible to understand and that I think is beutiful. 

Love you All.
And yes this one was about you.
Your so Vain.
This whole blog was about you.
Reap it all in.
You made me write all of this.
It is you.
I wasted this much of my life for you.
I hope your happy.
I spent all of 20 minutes vomiting words for you.
Do you love me yet?
Am I weird enough yet?
Am I gorgeous enough yet or should I get the knuckle enhancement?
Perhaps I should learn to play the tuba then will you love me? 

I have to say it is never going to work out between us. 
I descovered that I am not alone. 
I also descovered spell check. 

Renaldo Cornorando. Benaldo. FFFuuuccckkk.
Cencorshives. That is what it is called when it is blurred out when someone stabs someone else in prison. Crazy I know.

Also this is the end.
If you read to hear I literally don't know why you would have but I will personnaly kiss you on the lips. 

Saturday, November 17, 2012

This is what I call doing homework on Saturday.

And this is why...
I have a new nephew his name is Grey Omar Hansen and he is as cute as could be. At least from the pictures I have seen and I am sure in person he is just as adorable. I have an amazing niece who is a boost to my life even though I don't get to see her as often as I would like to. I have a great sister in law who is an amazing mother, wife, hair cutter person, cook, list creater, board gamer and all around good person. I have an older brother who is a great husband and father and would do anything for his children and wife. I have another older brother who is a warrior poet who is unafraid to make his voice heard. I have a little brother who is an actor and far ahead of his own age. I have a little sister who is an example of what it means to rise above and no matter what will not let heartbreak or hard times keep her down. I have a great father who has taken care of his family wonderfully and has done his very best to be the best father possible and will do what he needs to protect him and his. I have a mother who would give her life for her children and never think twice, she is kind, loving and an example of what it means to be pure love
I have amazing roommates who are bagpipers, soon to be doctors and lawyers, economists, comedians, runners, hikers, climbers, activists, hard workers, priesthood holders, preachers, brothers, viola guitar masters, bearded, gentlemen, engineers, boyfriends, vegans, health nuts, six pack havers, handsome bastards, family men, understanding, great listeners, forgiving, fashionable, teachers, russian speakers, put up with me'ers, designated drivers, bbqr's, scientists, travelers, missionaries, teton hikers,  LOTOJA champs, snowboarders, skiers, studiers, strength trainers, wrestlers, great driving companions, good cooks and just all around great people.
I have friends in Florida, Maine, Ohio, Iowa, Denmark, England, Idaho, Utah, Montana, California, The Kingdom of Lesotho, Australia, Colorado, Indiana, New York, Georgia, Hawaii, Provo, New Hampshire, In heaven and in Earth, Ireland, Alaska, Washington, Oregon, DC, Michigan, Wyoming and all other thinkable places here and there.
I have been in love. I have had my heart broken. Both were worthwhile. I have played both rugby and guitar in front of people. Both were terrifying. I have been a loser and a winner. I once won 500 dollars on a lottery ticket. I wasted it all. I once thought I had Cancer. I didn't. I thought if I was taller I would be happier. I was wrong. I once thought I was gonna get married. I didn't. A few times I thought I met the girl of my dreams. I hadn't. I once was a history major. I changed. And changed. and changed and changed and changed and changed and changed then changed schools then dropped out. And now I am an anthropology major. I dreamed of doing improv at Second City. I still do sometimes. I once drove from Idaho to Alaska. The next summer I drove from Idaho to Florida. I have a few tatoos. I love them and want many more. Or maybe just a few. I have had friends die. I still miss them. I have written countless songs. A few are alright. I once stood next to Al Sharpton. He was pretending to talk on the phone so he would not have to say hi to us. I have swam in the Pacific and the Atlantic. Ive gotten A's, B's,C's,D's,F's,Passes and fails. I have received gold stars and check pluses. I have substitute taught. I have been taught. Ive been in one fight. I won. I cried about it for hours. I have said horrible things I regret. I think about them and cringe. I have done wonderful acts of service. I think about them and cry. I have hugged children who have felt more pain than I could ever stand. I have rafted white water. I have run from dogs. I have painted walls and pictures. I have kissed beautiful women, in the back of cars, behind buses, in gas stations, in the woods and other more interesting places. I have read amazing books. Some changed me. Some made me wish I was a secret agent scientist. I had a Level 55 Tauren on World of Warcraft. It was awesome. I have jumped fences to get in hot tubs, climbed mountains to soak in hot springs and I acted them both out in acting classes. I have acted on stage and done great. I have acted on stage and wanted to melt in to the ground. I've been to the hospital as patient and visitor. I have been to Punk shows, bluegrass shows, classical concerts, hiphop shows, Metallica concerts and everyone of them had moments. Ive been baptized, ordained and once over the phone had my soul saved. I have also been told to go to hell. I have shoveled shit for money, I once got paid to chew gum, I once had a job where I was paid to play with the worlds best children. I have made terrible stir fry. I have made great burgers. I have had text books stolen from my car, later that cars wheel broke off. I have been thrown out of bars, I have been snuck in the back door. I met Jose Gonzales. I was under the influence and I gave him a hug, you could tell he felt weird. I have drunk too much. I have begged people to stop drinking. I have been wrong more times than I could count. I have been right a few. Ive hit a winning home run. I have lost a rugby match 85-0. We have had great dinner parties at our house. Sometimes people reject our invites. I watched the entire series of Firefly in 3 days. Loved every minute of it.
I have a best friend who has done more for me than I could ever repay. I would like to try. 
I have a blog. I write in it cause I want to be a better writer, I am trying to be braver when it comes to showing my work/art/music/lyrics/writing and other such endeavors. I get to meet people that are so neat all the time. 
If I have learned anything in my 24 years it is this. Life and living it is about experiences. Some of these are terrible. Some are amazing. But bad or good they all add to our own story. I think we should be grateful for all of them.
I am doing really good right now. Later on I probably won't be doing as good. That is just life. There are ups and downs. My grandma once told me "This is a bump in the road and we get over bumps in the road". Simple yet so true.
I have said it before and I will say it again. If you have read this far you are awesome. If not you are still pretty awesome. I enjoy writing in this blog. I might try to start adding pictures if I actually can figure out how to do it. When it comes to computers I am kind of a caveman. I wanted to make a joke about Socrates Cave but I don't really understand it so the joke would not be very clever.
Also it is 4:18 on a Saturday. I am wearing a sweater vest. I have a small pony tail. An amber and silver ring. Dark Blue Levi 514 Jeans which I can say are honestly the best Jeans on the market. Brown shoes. And drinking Green Tea. Listening to The Knife "Heartbeats".
And my dear friends, family or anyone that has happened upon this, YOU are why my life is awesome. It does not matter what you do if there are not people to share it with than what is the point?

Wednesday, November 7, 2012

I wrote a poem before biology.

Youth is wasted on the Young
Youth is waisted
Those who have it don't know
Those who seek it are joyless
There is no potion
No quick remedy for the loss
It is only missed once it is gone
the only sign of its passing
a steady decline in the hip
The young do what they can to destroy it
they curse god once they succed
why me why me?
The most common prayer
The old curse the young 
knowing the mistakes to come
The only evidence of the destruction
a steady decline in the lungs
Young don't know what joy is
The old know!
But it only comes from loss
why not me why not me?
The prayer of the lover not taken
Love cannot be enjoyed when overcome by the genitals
The only knowledge of is being gone
A steady decline of the heart
The young wish not to read
Books are burned for warmth
parties of wanton destruction of pages
I wish to see I wish to see!
The cry of those who cannot see
What I would see if I could go back!
The tears that fall to spite the cataracts
A steady decline of sight.
Youth is used
Taken for granted, spit upon
Never lived to it's fullest
wasted away feeling safe, sitting
Youth is Wasted 
The crime is, the young don't know,
 Ignorance is blissful
Youth is waisted on the young

A steady decline of Justice.

Tuesday, November 6, 2012

I cast a vote for no more stinky farts.

I will study no more tonight forever. 

Me too my mom via facebook chat "yeah I am deleting all the idiots off my facebook".
Momma Lori" Cut them some slack not everyone follows politics closely".
Wise words from the most important lady in my life. I have so much to learn from her when it comes to loving all people. I try hard but I am still no Lori.

Well the election is over and we can wake up tomorrow. That is what is important we are going to wake up tomorrow. There are people who are going to sleep tonight for the last time. Let us hope that they can make the transformation to the complete unknown painlessly. And for those who have a painful road to crawl down, I hope there is a heaven (or something just as cool like a seven eleven with unlimited slushys and no brain freeze and you get to drink your slushy while going down a never ending warm water slide). I hope that those who are in pain will be compensated on the other side for their pain.

So in November I have heard that you are supposed to mention something everyday that you are thankful for. Well I am doing it Blogo Style and I am going to write as many as possible.
  1. I am thankful for people who will disagree with me and challenge my opinions in a kind way.
  2. I am thankful for the tights that women wear as pants.
  3. I am thankful for Boxer Briefs, they are truly non-partisan.
  4. I am thankful for Computers, internet, nook, phone, cameras.
  5. I am thankful for college.
  6. I am thankful for the times and places I have been.
  7. I am thankful that the future is unknown allowing me to have an adventure.
  8. I am thankful that I know how to read.
  9. I am thankful for my medicine.
  10. I am thankful for diet coke.
  11. I am thankful for Facebook.
  12. I am thankful for my friends and my family.
  13. I am thankful for Tapatio.
  14. I am thankful for nature.
  15. I am thankful for SG.
  16. I am thankful for emotions.
  17. i am thankful for boots.
  18. I am thankful for sticky notes.
  19. I am thankful for Mrs. Nielsen and her wise teachings.
  20. I am thankful for the gift of humor.
  21. I am thankful for music.
  22. I am thankful for this blog, and people reading it.
  23. I am thankful for Wes Anderson.
  24. I am thankful for a lot of other stuff, maybe I will add it on later.
  25. I am thankful for Paul Newman.
  26. I am thankful for a roof over my head and paved roads beneath my feet and food in my stomach and a book in my bag.
  27. I am thankful for learning.
  28. I am thankful for my niece and soon to come nephew.
  29. I am thankful for sports.
  30. I am thankful for the red and green squiggly lines that appear under the words I am typing. It really helps me out.

Someone said that the election of Barack Obama was what was going to lead to the end of the United States and the end of days  as in the end of the world.
Well I hate to break it to everybody but the whole end of days, yeah its not gonna happen. If it does happen it will be from some sort of micro-biological evolution similar to the black death and if that is the case it will not have been ordered bu god. I am just throwing it out there. I think it is interesting to preach that god is loving and yet when he decides the time is right he will return and all people will die horrible painful deaths. Does that not seem a little contradictory? I am probably wrong I am no theologist. Just a simple student in Utah. 
You know what I could see god doing? 
Showing up with a "free hugs" t-shirt and doing nice things for people. He would say, "Hey, I feel like if you wanted to learn some stuff from me it might help you and your family be happy. But you know, if you want to keep doing what your doing I would still like to be your friend".
Yeah that is the god I hope exists. 
I always thought it would be funny if Jesus went to a phish concert. He could wear his robes and sandals and would totally fit in. All the other fans would be like,"yeah love and stuff".

I think that a BA might be better than a BS for Grad school but I don't really know.
I need some snow in the mountains.

Well here is another collection of ramblings. I am happy. I am warm. I am sleepy.
"may you rest with angels"

Sunday, November 4, 2012

Top Tens

List Time:
Top Ten's for Ammon!
  1. Extremely Loud and Incredibly Close.
  2. Room.
  3. The Time Machine.
  4. The Giving Tree.
  5. The Perks of Being a Wallflower.
  6. Keep the Aspidistra Flying.
  7. The Catcher in the Rye.
  8. The Hobbit.
  9. Enders Game.
  10. Walk 2 Moons.
  1. Wes Anderson Films.
  2. Star Wars "the original three".
  3. Rudy.
  4. Almost Famous.
  5. Wayne's World.
  6. A River Runs Through It.
  7. True Grit
  1. Gold Bug Hot Springs
  2. Glacier National Park
  3. New Samyrna Beach
  4. Yellowstone National Park
  5. Grand Teton Nalional Park
  6. Jackson Hole Wyoming
  7. Bozeman Montana
  8. Salt Lake City
  9. Driggs/ Victor Idaho
  10. Logan Canyan 
Bands/ musical artists.
  1. The Hold Steady
  2. The Black Keys
  3. Neil Young w/Crazy Horse/ Solo
  4. Dinosaur Jr
  5. Tom Waits
  6. Carolina Chocolate Drops
  7. Two Gallants
  8. Iron and Wine
  9. Damien Jurado
  10. The Band
Television Shows
  1. DeadWood
  2. Carnival
  3. Downton Abbey
  4. Seinfeld
  5. The Simpsons
  6. Six Feet Under
  7. Parks and Rec
  8. Firefly
  9. Dexter
  10. Survivors
  1. Fat Tire
  2. Devestator Double Bock
  3. Yuengling
  4. Alaskan Amber
  5. Blue Moon
  6. Medelo Negro
  7. Wasatch Apricot Heifenweizen
  8. Shock Top
  9. Wasatch Summerbrau Lager
  10. Pabst Blue Ribbon
  1. Guitar
  2. Reading
  3. Hiking
  4. Beer
  5. Conversation
  6. Rugby
  7. Snowboarding
  8. Studying
  9. Eating
  10. Movies
  1. Red
  2. yellow
  3. Green
  4. the
  5. rest
  6. dont
  7. matter
  8. one
  9. bit
  10. !

Saturday, November 3, 2012

I got 99 problems and Newt Gingrich ain't one.

           I have been wanting to write and record some music on my own but I am never satisfied with what I come up with, especially lyrically. BUT I think that the problem is that I have this notion in my mind that people just walk around and have an idea pop into their head and they all of the sudden write a great song/book/poem/movie/essay/stand up routine. I doesn't work that way. Perhaps the initial Idea comes from no where, but there has to be serious dedicated work to producing anything worth while. So that is what I am gonna do start making myself pay more attention and work harder. 

          So this is the new goals for self improvement:
  1. I will be dedicating time to writing music and giving my full attention to it at that time.
  2. I have a list of 100 Books I want to read and I need to get started on them, considering I have a tendency to add more to the list at any time.
  3. I think I want to Run a 10k. I think it sounds like a good idea. I have never heard someone say, "God I really wish I had not Run that race, it really ruined my day/week/month/year/life".
  4. When It comes to practicing guitar I want to be able to play 25 blues/rock and roll songs to my satisfaction.
  5. I want to improve my writing. I want to write short stories/essays/research proposals and anything else I think would be interesting. I need to spend time each week stories and such with no interruptions just like writing music.
  6. I want to Increase my leg strength. I played Prop in the last Rugby Match I played in and It was awesome. I liked it much more than hook but if I want to play it well I really need to work on my endurance and leg strength. This goal ties in very well to goal number 3.
  7. I have been growing my hair out for quite a while now. I want to be able to donate a full head of hair. It has to be 11 inches i believe so that one is out of my control but I will continue to work at it.
  8. I want to be able to cook good healthy food. My room mates are great cooks and they are able to make great healthy food on a fairly small budget. 
  9. I really want to participate in some ethnographic research. I think it would be great to assist someone or perhaps do some independent undergrad research but I really don't know how so that is something I will need some help from people i look up too.
  10. Someday I want to be a Professor. 
  11. Who has 2 thumbs and wants more tattoo's and perhaps a nose piercing? This guy! Yeah i said it a nose piercing. I think they are awesome and it is a great way to challenge social gender norms!!! That is something we should all do as much as possible.
  12. I want to be able to approach new people and say, "hello". I know that seems like a simple goal but for me it is terrifying. 
  13. I have thought about trying to join an improve troupe again. I was speaking to Zach in our room the other night and we were talking about improve and it made me miss it so much. Perhaps I will look into it. 
  14. Though I have made many improvements I want to continue to work on being as honestly myself in public as possible. To speak my own voice and not be afraid. To not hold back. To make myself be heard. To stand up for what I think is right or just.
  15. I have such a hard time keeping in touch with people I care about and this is something I really want to get better at. Perhaps making 3 phone calls or skype dates with people I care for that I have not spoken to in a long time. 
  16. I want to do 50 hikes this summer. I know that is a lofty goal but I think it is totally reachable. I would love to know the whole of Logan Canyon like the back of my hand.
  17. I want to rock climb. That is a simple one. 
  18. I want to join more student clubs at USU. I love being on campus and I would love to be involved in more clubs and groups.
  19. I would like to do more work with the social issues I believe in. Fighting for equal marriage rights. Fighting to delete offensive language from everyday American English.
  20. I want to speak another language. I want to speak spanish.
  21. I want to get my bachelors degree within 3 years. 
  22. I want to apply to grad school within 3 years.
  23. I want to have a rock and roll band that plays shows on a regular basis.
  24. I want a dog. Someday.
  25. When I have more money I would like to get a car again. It sure is nice at times.
  26. I want to brew my own beer.
  27. I would like to become learned concerning wine.
  28. I want to travel to another country and continent. South America sounds cool and Australia and Europe I guess. Africa seriously Africa!
  29. I want to meet Barack Obama and shake his hand. That is a dream.
  30. I want to Hike the Appalachian trail. Or maybe the pacific coast trail.
  31. I want to become a better snow-boarder. And no I don't mean living in a house made of snow silly. I mean that thing I do going down hills when I look like grizzly bear that has got its feet stuck in the door of a log cabin and then fell down a mountain.
  32. I want to have set foot in every state in the nation. And perhaps all the territories and other things the united states owns. 
  33. Improve my writing/grammar/spelling. It would be nice if everything I write was not covered in red squiggly lines.
  34. I want to be able to fly fish and I want to be able to do it without looking like a total nimbus.

Well these are my goals. Wants, wishes and desires. I don't know if anyone else shares any of these but if somebody would like to join me on completing any of these that would be totally appreciated. I think with teamwork people are able to get things done faster and easier. So if you share any of the same interest let me know. For your health!

Also if you read to here thank you so very much for reading. I don't really know what a blog is supposed to be, but I just like to put stuff on here because. Perhaps people like reading it perhaps not. Eh.